1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:- Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:-Don't u know, I sell tickets in black over here..
------------ --------- --------- --------- ------
2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question:-Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.. ...why don't you try again.
------------ --------- --------- --------- -----
3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...
Stupid Question:-Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-Why? Would it rather have been you?
------------ --------- --------- --------- -----
4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-Is ! The "Paneer butter Masala" dish good??
Answer:-No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.
------------ --------- --------- --------- -----
5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years...
Stupid Question:- Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:-Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself
------------ --------- --------- --------- -----
6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question:- Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:- No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.
------------ --------- --------- --------- -----
7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question:- Sorry. Were you sleeping?
Answer:- No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not.You thought I was sleeping.... You dumb witted moron.
------------ --------- --------- --------- -----
8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question:- Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:- No, its autumn and I'm shedding.... ..
